in the thick

of things

Isn’t Death an *!#*%!* ?

I’m fifty-five, sixty, or sixty-five. Yes, I’m o-l-d-e-r, yet I have plenty of zip and a great smile. The big “D” word (death)—don’t need it. I’m hanging on to what I’ve got. The idea that nothing is permanent is true. I don’t deny it. Death is part of the life cycle; I’ve seen it in things around me: squalls, gardens, pets. Sure, parents and good friends are dying, and I know that is part of life. It’s just that it’s not happening to me at this moment. It’s just not happening to me. It’s just not happening.

 

Higher Self  When you resist accepting the truth, impermanence, you rob yourself of seeing the now of each moment.

 

Ego  I have a momentous agenda: people to see, places to go, and things that I want.

 

Higher Self  And, impermanence comes anyway. Nothing can stop it. It is a natural part of life.

 

Ego  No graceful aging for me—I’m going out fighting! I have my cruise plans, personal trainer appointments, and self-esteem-saving Grecian Formula.

 

Higher Self  Busyness is a mask for trying to control the future and, at the same time, for preventing the past from repeating. To maintain the status quo takes tremendous attention and energy.

 

Ego  Well, at least I’m in charge of my life.

 

Higher Self  Or so you think. How you age depends on your intention. Do you focus on a small, stressed out Ego that thinks it’s in control? or Is your focus on a more encompassing Self that shows compassion, love and equanimity? intention

 

Ego  Searching for meaning in my life—I don’t need it—that’s for really old, confused people! I know who I am and what I need.

 

Higher Self  Should you change your mind, know that there is another way to live your later years with less stress, greater self-acceptance, and more inner peace. Explore death now so you can understand what is really important in life. It doesn’t mean that death will come sooner. You will simply be more prepared for the inevitable. Let me know how we might partner to face the occurrences of impermanence together. I am with you in Body.

 

Ego  What did you say?

 

Higher Self  I continue to send you love and hold space for you to soften your heart. At some point, you will live in each moment, accepting limitations, illness, and loss. You will learn to feel comfortable with acceptance and understanding of all that happens to you as you age.

 

Ego  You never quit!

 

 

© 2015 Barbara L. Krause